Disney: Expectation versus Reality

Over the past twenty-some years, I’ve learned a lot about life from Disney. I mean, A LOT. Always wish upon a star, be a diamond in the rough, never tangle with a sea witch. But as you know, the movies aren’t always all they’re cracked up to be. Here are a just few Disney expectations that didn’t quite pass the test of reality.

1. Diving

Swim class? What the heck, Mom? I don’t need swimming and diving lessons in the fifth grade. Please. I learned everything I need to know about free-falling poise from Pocahontas.

Expectation

Reality

2. Sewing

Ugh. I have NOTHING to wear. You know what? I’m going to start making all of my own clothes. That’s right – all of them. I’ve seen Cinderella like a hundred times. Seriously, how hard could it be?

Expectation

Reality

3. Swimming

Ahhh-ahhh-ahhh, ahhh-ahhh-ahhh! Oh, hello there! Don’t mind me. I’m just gracefully flipping underwater in my swirly-twirly way whilst singing to the invisible marine life in my 3-foot swimming pool.

Expectation

Reality

4. Pirates

I’d walk your plank, Jack Sparrow.

Expectation

Reality

5. Wild Animals

Of course I want a pet raccoon. They have a mild temperament, wicked braiding skills and unparalleled affection – like snuggley feral kittens.

Expectation

Reality

6. Stranger Danger

Dance with you entirely alone in a dark secluded alleyway? I thought you’d never ask!

Expectation

Reality

7. Flying

Faith ✓ – Trust ✓ – Pixie Dust ✓

Houston, we’re ready for takeoff.

Expectation

Reality

So, what false expectations has Disney given you?